Wednesday, December 01, 2004

Five bad things about Australia


1. Flies
Without doubt the worst thing about Sydney - every time you venture into a park the flies descend and start to annoy. From my limited knowledge of flying insects, they seem to be large fruit flies - which makes me wonder what part of me they confuse with fruit. Evidently it's the face, as these pests have the habit of going for your eyes, nose, or ears. You wave them away, and they fly to another part of your face. I've found through experience that after four or five landings, they fly off - so you just have to keep swishing. There's no chance of swatting them. Maybe a hat with corks in in the answer. Hmm....

2. Bank charges
Banks over here have some nerve - they charge you for keeping your money, and then charge you for giving it back. My typical account has a $5 monthly fee. Also I have 15 free 'transactions' a month (ATM withdrawls, counter services) - after that you get charged 60c for each 'transaction'. My rent goes out of my account via direct debit - except each time that happens I get charged $1.80. OK - these amounts are hardly a lot - but it's the principle.

3. The heat
I think I've covered this - I'll just say that last night the temperature at midnight was 25C and that it reached 30C at 10:30am this morning. I think you get the picture.

4. TV schedules
Very odd this - it must be a nightmare for people trying to set the timer on a VCR. Sometimes programmes start up to ten minutes early, and some finish later than in the TV guides. There are no explanations for this. Sometimes random news or sports updates are added. A programme will start, and immediately after the opening credits will go to an ad-break. Similarly there's always an ad-break with about a minute to go before the programme ends, which can be great if there's a cliff-hanger ending.

5. Australians

Edit - 02/07/2009

This post was written almost five years ago as a joke - if I'd realised at the time it would become the top article if you Google for 'bad things about Australia' I would have put a bit more thought and effort into it. Don't take it too seriously...

Edit - 22/06/2010

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